THE REPUBLICAN CAGE MATCH

I only watched a few minutes of the Republican debate. I suddenly remembered it was on, found the channel and got there in time to hear Ted Cruz excoriating the media for creating “a cage match.” Which struck me as amusing, since I don’t think the Republican candidates need anyone in the media to create that atmosphere; they’re doing a bang-up job of sucker punching each other all on their own. So I took my dog for a walk, looked at the moon emerging in the sky, and happily   forgot about the collection of grumpy people duking it out in Colorado.

Besides, I knew I’d get the highlights the following day. So, unless I’ve missed something startlingly presidential and dignified, here is what I think we learned last night: Ted Cruz has the well-honed instincts of a playground bully who knows when to belch out insults and get the crowd in his corner. Ben Carson isn’t very good at math (apparently his tax plan doesn’t add up.) Jeb Bush has now insulted the French by accusing Marco Rubio of observing a “French work week.” While the French do take more vacation time than Americans, they have pretty productive work schedules. Good job, Jeb, now France is mad at us. Mike Huckabee wears Trump ties (who even knew there were Trump ties?) And Carly Fiorina thinks she is Hillary’s worst nightmare, and this should be grounds enough to elect her to the highest office in the land.

Also, there were these revelations: Marco Rubio got a 1 million dollar book deal and would like us to get the paperback. Ted Cruz is (I guess) sober, since he wouldn’t be a good beer drinking pal, but he could drive you home. Donald Trump, when it comes to carrying a gun, likes to be unpredictable, which means you’re never going to know if he’s packing heat or not. Also, he negotiated the length of the debate down to 2 hours so they could “get the hell out of there.”

When I was a kid, I sat with my parents and watched a debate between Richard Nixon and John Kennedy. I was bored and didn’t really care, but I do remember thinking that both men seemed like they could be president. To a kid, they both exuded authority and the kind of command one associated with an important office. I think the fact that Richard Nixon is looking good by comparison says a lot about the Republican candidates.

5 Responses to THE REPUBLICAN CAGE MATCH

  1. Rodney Wilson says:

    That’s it in a nutshell.

  2. David Marks says:

    Patti, you nailed it; you summed up salient measures of these buffoons in brilliant nutshells! I expect no less from you, and I’ll add this: when Ben Carson invokes Ronald Reagan, that’s the first sure sign that the party is in trouble. They say they emulate the hero of the GOP, when in fact, they soil his memory. Greatness isn’t measured in rhetoric…it’s measured in deed alone, and none of them has the right to hold themselves to such a distinguished alter.

  3. Michael Anketell says:

    I’ve watched the first two Republican debates now
    and decided last night that I won’t be
    watching another. What a gab-fest of
    nothingness.

  4. Edward Jenny says:

    nicely done, thanks

  5. Jane May says:

    Right on Patti! The brief time I watched this debate, again rose fear in me that none of them has a clue about foreign affairs. How scary to imagine any of them dealing with the Middle East. I say also, “you nailed it Patti!

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